Decisions

I've just found out over the course of a few days that deciding for myself to do a task, aka choosing to do it with my will creates much more joy than being forced to do it or procrastinating by doing it. Even if a task is something I hate or something that hurts me, when I make it a point to  mentally make the choice (when I say along the lines of "I choose to do this." to myself), my

Waffles

Okay I just really need to get this out in the most haphazard way possible because I don't want to think of the perfect way to say it right now. I just want to say it.

I need to stop searching so hard for the absolute truth. That's what I've been doing for these past several months. I've been searching for the absolute truth when said absolute truth doens't really exist. When I try to watch a movie, I end up getting frustrated because I don't understand every little thing that is going on, because I don't understand the situation and dynamic 100% clearly.

I just figured out when it happens most often

I just figured out when this sadness thing happens most often, and I thought I should share it with you lovely readers. My mind goes into worry whirlpool mode most often when the energy is slowing down after a great expenditure of it, that is when I've used up a great deal of energy and my body wants to relax, to chill down, to tone down, that sort of thing. That is the time when depression has the most powerful influence.

The Juices of Sadness

Rolling down a hill

Swirling in a vortex

Pushed by the current

Automatic

The easy way out

There's surfing (riding the wave), and there's bailing (getting beat up by the wave)...